There are many ways to live life. Some people aim to follow the encouraging approach. They enjoy encouraging people and want to help them to live fulfilling lives.
Some people follow the exploiting approach. They aim to exploit people and situations to fulfil their own agenda. This can bring benefits for themselves but can produce collateral damage for other people.
Different people follow these approaches for different reasons. Let’s look at how they may translate these into action.
The Encouraging Approach
Some people learn this approach from parents, teachers or other key people who gave them encouragement. Some people follow it because they believe that we are here to serve both present and future generations.
Such people believe in helping others. They encourage people to do what they enjoy – providing they don’t hurt other people. They also enjoy helping others to achieve success.
They believe in being generous. At the same time, however, they recognise the warning signs if others people try to take advantage of them. They enjoy giving but they refuse to become victims.
As mentioned earlier, different people learn the encouraging approach in different ways. Here are some things that people may say about such experiences.
Person A
“I had wonderful parents. We did not have much money but they were kind and taught us to love life. They counted their blessings and the conversation around the table was positive.
“Most parents say they want their children to be happy. Our parents really believed in this approach. They encouraged us to follow our interests, explore and learn in our ways. This is something I want to pass on to our children.”
Person B
“I was helped by one teacher at school. I wasn’t very academic but I was good at football and captain of the side. One day the teacher took me aside and gave me the following messages.
‘You will get on in life if you live like you play football. You give 100% and encourage other people. You have the ability to be a good leader. Keep inspiring people and you will go far in life.’
“I remember those ten minutes and the messages that the teacher gave me from my ten years in school.”
Person C
“Serendipity has played a big part in my career. During my early twenties I tried many different jobs before working in hospitality. It was when I was in a hotel that we hosted a conference for people working in hospices.
“One of the doctors asked if I would be interested in doing volunteer work in their hospice. They had noticed something about how I worked and suggested I might be good at helping people.
“That doctor changed my life. I started as a volunteer, began studying and eventually become a nurse. The work is rewarding and I learn so much from the people who are nearing the end of their lives.”
People who follow the encouraging approach sometimes go through certain stages in life. They often start by trying to encourage many people in their lives and work. This can be rewarding but also challenging.
They may then enter another stage. They still aim to encourage their loved ones and colleagues. But they begin to focus their efforts on people and projects where they feel others are also taking responsibility.
Such people may then focus their efforts in order to be more effective. They may concentrate on helping certain kinds of people and develop their expertise in this specific activity.
People who follow the encouraging approach often want to serve others and help them succeed. Sometimes they get the helper’s high but that is just a by-product of helping people to shape a positive future.
The Exploiting Approach
Some people follow the exploiting approach in their lives and work. They use people in order to feel powerful or fulfil their own agenda. They aim to make sure that they win and other people lose.
Such people may exploit others on an economic or emotional level. Some see others as simply numbers who can help them to make a profit. Some treat other people in a way that causes physical or emotional pain.
Some set up institutions that cause harm to people or the planet. This can create damage that has far reaching implications for both present and future generations.
People who follow the encouraging approach may aim to do work that helps people or the planet. They may also aim to pass on knowledge that helps people to shape a positive future.
Let’s return to your own life and work. Looking ahead, can you think of a specific situation where you may want to follow elements of the encouraging approach? This could be in your personal or professional life.
How could you follow this approach in your own way? It may be something as simple as being kind, encouraging a person or helping to create a positive environment in your work.
We never forget a good teacher. They may show they care and help us to shape our future. The same can be said for a good encourager. Such people may sometimes give us positive memories for life.
If you wish, try tackling the exercise on this theme. This invites you to complete the following sentences.
Leave a Reply