Different people see life in different ways. Some people see obstacles as opportunities for achieving certain outcomes. Let’s explore this approach.
Person A had difficulties at school. They then did a variety of jobs but wanted to become a social worker. This proved difficult because they had not passed certain exams.
They continued to do their day job and also began doing voluntary work with homeless people. This led to them specialising in helping people to recover from addictions.
After several years they reached a point where they felt the need to study and go to university. This eventually led to them being accepted as a mature student.
The first months went okay but they began to find the academic work frustrating. They found it difficult to write in an academic style and this led to them failing the end of first year exams.
The person needed to make a decision. They could choose: a) to try overcome the obstacle of learning to write in a certain way; b) to leave university and do project work in recovery programmes for addicts.
They chose the second option. Building on their contacts from the therapeutic network, they got their first two projects. This eventually led to them setting-up a business that provided practical ways to help recovering addicts.
Person B faced a different kind of obstacle. This was a long series of treatment sessions to tackle an illness. At first they felt depressed. They did not look forward to the thirty five sessions spread over seven weeks.
They then began to reframe the situation. Here is how they described their approach.
“First, I started by focusing on the overall goal – which was to be healthy and live longer. It was more heartening to focus on that one goal rather than making a list of thirty five sessions that had to be attended.
“Second, I organised my days so that I could do creative work in the morning and go for treatment sessions in the afternoon. This helped me to feel more in charge of my days. I got the creative kicks in the morning and the health help in the afternoon.
Third, I reframed the two hours of driving – plus the two hours of treatment – as a chance to reflect and explore ideas. This helped me to make good use of the travelling and treatment times.”
Person C was a talented footballer I met when he was eighteen. Spotted at an early age, he spent time in the academies of several clubs. A resilient yet sensitive person, he was often made captain of the various teams.
During our mentoring session he expressed doubts about following the professional player route. He described this in the following way.
“I could probably make a living in the game but I do not like the culture in some clubs. Some coaches are good but some still seem in the stone age. They bully people and cause harm. I am strong enough to survive but I want to go a different route.
“After lots of research, my agent has got me a soccer scholarship in America. This involves playing for the university team but also studying sports psychology. I want to keep playing but also begin taking my coaching badges.”
They took this route. Whilst captaining the university team, they began coaching young people in the area. This led to the university offering them the chance to do an MA and also take a paid part-time coaching role for younger players.
Let’s return to your own life. Looking ahead, can you think of a situation where you may see an obstacle as an opportunity? This could be in your personal or professional life.
What may be the situation? What may be the potential obstacle? What may be the potential opportunities? What may be the outcomes you want to achieve? How can you do your best to achieve these aims?
If you wish, try tackling the exercise on this theme. This invites you to complete the following sentences.
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